23 February 2002: Difference between revisions

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====1. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#9000 Points to Cut Peter Stringfellow’s Hair|9000 Points to Cut Peter Stringfellow’s Hair]] ''(0:00:00)'' ====
====1. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#9000 Points If They Cut Peter Stringfellow’s Hair|9000 Points If They Cut Peter Stringfellow’s Hair]] ''(0:00:00)'' ====
Intros sound like show-as-usual this week, until Ricky says he's allowing two "trendy toffs" to come on the show live on-air to raise money for a cancer charity scavenger hunt, for which they get 17,000 points.
The boys prepare us for the arrival of some posh lads, who are scavenging for charity, by analysing their challenges.
====2. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#The Twat In the Hat|The Twat In the Hat]] ''(0:03:08)'' ====
 
Ricky gives away some of the secrets of modern radio, Suzanne newly learns about Karl's fame, "Shave and a Haircut" knocking sent into space to contact aliens, "Oggy, Oggy, Oggy", first telling of the [[Little Donkey]] story.
====2. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#The Twat In The Hat|The Twat In The Hat]] ''(0:03:08)'' ====
====3. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Right Van Man|Right Van Man]]''(0:09:23)''====
We learn a little about Suzanne - she's a journalist, but not like a proper one, she's upset with Karl's new found fame as an 'idiot', this prompts Karl's telling of the [[little donkey|Little Donkey]] story, the highs and lows of drumming at his school nativity play, including how to contact alien life forms with 'Oggy, Oggy, Oggy'.  
Call Steve at home if you want his opinion on hip hop,  White Van Man questions about Kyle vs Dido, taxes rising to pay for NHS improvements is OK by Karl because his dad was in hospital once (where Karl got his first gig on hospital radio), the infamous "What were the things in Gremlins called?" question.
 
====4. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Skoe and Belch|Skoe and Belch]] ''(0:14:20)'' ====
====3. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#What Were The Things In Gremlins?|What Were The Things In Gremlins?]]''(0:09:23)''====
Posh lads with nicknames doing a scavenger hunt.
 
====5. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Snakes are Deaf|Snakes are Deaf]] ''(0:18:53)'' ====
Call Steve at home if you want his opinion on hip hop,  White Van Man questions about Kylie versus Dido, taxes rising to pay for NHS improvements is OK by Karl because his dad was in hospital once (where Karl got his first gig on hospital radio), the infamous "What were the things in Gremlins called?" question.
Ricky's doing too much for charity, White Van Man/Karl continues with British Olympic Curling Team, World's tallest man living in Neasden, Global warming.  Deaf spiders and a load of sparrows somewhere.
 
====4. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Skoe And Belch|Skoe And Belch]] ''(0:14:20)'' ====
Trendy posh boys joins our heroes to discuss their scavenger hunt challenge and what kind of music they like - rubbish music, they give a big shout out to S Club 7, in the hopes of getting on stage with them, did they - we don't know or care.
 
====5. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Snakes Are Deaf|Snakes Are Deaf]] ''(0:18:53)'' ====
White Van Karl continues, Karl is pleased about the British Olympic gold medal for curling, but not the hype that's followed; the world's tallest man has just turned up in Neasden, he should get his tumour sorted according to Karl and finally the British climate is changing, making it hospitable for more exotic wildlife, Karl is not pleased, he'd rather have bad weather and avoid deadly snakes.
 
====6. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Bad Lyrics By Good Artists|Bad Lyrics By Good Artists]] ''(0:23:11)''====
====6. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Bad Lyrics By Good Artists|Bad Lyrics By Good Artists]] ''(0:23:11)''====
Pretentious song titles, confusion over Enrique Inglesias' ''Hero'' video, and an announcement about Karl to come.
Steve thinks corny songs are preferable to pretentious twoddle, Ricky and Steve break down the plot of Enrique Iglesias' ''Hero'' video. Followed by adverts!!!!
 
====7. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#It's That Point In The Show|It's That Point In The Show]] ''(0:25:19)''====
====7. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#It's That Point In The Show|It's That Point In The Show]] ''(0:25:19)''====
Ricky wants to play classics, Song For the Lovers written with his lovely arse.
Ricky wants to play classics, Song For The Lovers is written by Jimmy Webb with his lovely arse. What?
 
====8. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#They Just Wheel You Out|They Just Wheel You Out]] ''(0:26:48)''====
====8. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#They Just Wheel You Out|They Just Wheel You Out]] ''(0:26:48)''====
Karl promos Camfield's nu metal show so Ricky and Steve make Karl turn off his mic.
Steve hopes nu-metal fans can appreciate these classic songs, Karl tries to plug Ian Camfield's show - to the displeasure of Rick and Steve, Karl gets upset, Steve orders him to switch his microphone off and stop interrupting Ricky telling us about Camfield, he does, they forgive Karl, more ads!!!!
====9. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#English Quite Good|English - Quite Good]] ''(0:28:40)''====
 
Karl's job application at Granada TV, the well-known European leader  "Flobbadan Milosevic", and the big announcement: Karl never received his GCSE results and Ricky and Steve are going to track them down. Karl thinks there's no need to revise.  Snakes don't have ears so Karl wonders how you can put them down. Karl had to use gold ink at work the day-of GCSEs.
====9. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#English Quite Good|English Quite Good]] ''(0:28:40)''====
Karl had trouble filling out a job application, misunderstanding the 'language' section, but he's making an effort, by nearly remembering the name of Slobodan Milosevic. We learn that Karl never got his GCSE exam results, he thinks he took English, Maths, Art and Physics, but can't remember it well and he doesn't believe in revision. What's bugging Karl, is how do you put down a snake? You can pick it up because it's deaf, but putting it down? Who knows. Back to academia and next week, on this very show, live on-air, we will find out Karl's exam results... oh yeah, he didn't collect them because he had to use gold ink in his printing job that day.
 
====10. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Bruce Lee Is Not Dead|Bruce Lee Is Not Dead]] ''(0:36:44)''====
====10. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Bruce Lee Is Not Dead|Bruce Lee Is Not Dead]] ''(0:36:44)''====
Bruce Lee faked his death to work as an undercover cop and Karl makes some good old-fashioned racist comments.
Bruce Lee faked his death to work as an undercover cop and Karl makes some good old-fashioned racist comments.
====11. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Ricky Won't Diss Steve or His Black Queen|Ricky Won't Diss Steve or His Black Queen]] ''(0:40:48)''====
====11. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#Ricky Won't Diss Steve or His Black Queen|Ricky Won't Diss Steve or His Black Queen]] ''(0:40:48)''====
Dilated Peoples do a trail for Steve.
Dilated Peoples do a trail for Steve.
====12. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#There Has To Be Shit Involved|There Has To Be Shit Involved]]''(0:42:30)''====
====12. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#There Has To Be Shit Involved|There Has To Be Shit Involved]]''(0:42:30)''====
Steve remembers Snoop Dogg lyrics, did Elvis fake his death?
Steve remembers Snoop Dogg lyrics, did Elvis fake his death?
====13. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#I Don't Think You'll be Going Back to the Fish Factory|I Don't Think You'll be Going Back to the Fish Factory]] ''(0:47:47)''====
====13. [[23 February 2002/Transcript#I Don't Think You'll be Going Back to the Fish Factory|I Don't Think You'll be Going Back to the Fish Factory]] ''(0:47:47)''====
Ricky admits he knows what Karl was thinking with his Mowgli comment, Karl would relax Ricky, the low aspirations of Family Fortunes contestants, Ian Moore "Naturally",  Ricky insults the Duchess of York and Steve claims he wrote Lady In Red, Song for the Lovers is early pre-gravely Tom Waits.
Ricky admits he knows what Karl was thinking with his Mowgli comment, Karl would relax Ricky, the low aspirations of Family Fortunes contestants, Ian Moore "Naturally",  Ricky insults the Duchess of York and Steve claims he wrote Lady In Red, Song for the Lovers is early pre-gravely Tom Waits.
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'''FBI:''' Elvis, it’s a good idea. I’m just wondering if there’s maybe something a little bit more…glamorous…for your death. I mean, you could take a bullet for the president. <br>
'''FBI:''' Elvis, it’s a good idea. I’m just wondering if there’s maybe something a little bit more…glamorous…for your death. I mean, you could take a bullet for the president. <br>
'''ELVIS:''' Huh. Wot? And shit all over him? <br>
'''Elvis:''' Huh. Wot? And shit all over him? <br>
'''FBI:''' No no no. There’d be no crap at all. No, you just…you could just take a bullet and… <br>
'''FBI:''' No no no. There’d be no crap at all. No, you just…you could just take a bullet and… <br>
'''ELVIS:''' There has to be shit involved.  
'''Elvis:''' There has to be shit involved.  


==Playlist==
==Playlist==

Revision as of 11:10, 12 October 2007

Xfm Series 1
November 2001 - May 2002
List of episodes

Episodes:

  1. 10 November 2001 (Transcript)
  2. 17 November 2001 (Transcript)
  3. 24 November 2001 (Transcript)
  4. 01 December 2001 (Transcript)
  5. 08 December 2001 (Transcript)
  6. 15 December 2001 (Transcript)
  7. 22 December 2001 (Transcript)
  8. 12 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.1
  9. 19 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.2
  10. 26 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.3
  11. 09 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.4
  12. 16 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.5
  13. 23 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.6
  14. 02 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.7
  15. 09 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.8
  16. 16 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.9
  17. 23 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.10
  18. 30 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.11
  19. 06 April 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.12
  20. 13 April 2002 (Transcript)
  21. 20 April 2002 (Transcript)
  22. 27 April 2002 (Transcript)
  23. 04 May 2002 (Transcript)

Track Listing

For a full transcript of this episode see 23 February 2002/Transcript

1. 9000 Points If They Cut Peter Stringfellow’s Hair (0:00:00)

The boys prepare us for the arrival of some posh lads, who are scavenging for charity, by analysing their challenges.

2. The Twat In The Hat (0:03:08)

We learn a little about Suzanne - she's a journalist, but not like a proper one, she's upset with Karl's new found fame as an 'idiot', this prompts Karl's telling of the Little Donkey story, the highs and lows of drumming at his school nativity play, including how to contact alien life forms with 'Oggy, Oggy, Oggy'.

3. What Were The Things In Gremlins?(0:09:23)

Call Steve at home if you want his opinion on hip hop, White Van Man questions about Kylie versus Dido, taxes rising to pay for NHS improvements is OK by Karl because his dad was in hospital once (where Karl got his first gig on hospital radio), the infamous "What were the things in Gremlins called?" question.

4. Skoe And Belch (0:14:20)

Trendy posh boys joins our heroes to discuss their scavenger hunt challenge and what kind of music they like - rubbish music, they give a big shout out to S Club 7, in the hopes of getting on stage with them, did they - we don't know or care.

5. Snakes Are Deaf (0:18:53)

White Van Karl continues, Karl is pleased about the British Olympic gold medal for curling, but not the hype that's followed; the world's tallest man has just turned up in Neasden, he should get his tumour sorted according to Karl and finally the British climate is changing, making it hospitable for more exotic wildlife, Karl is not pleased, he'd rather have bad weather and avoid deadly snakes.

6. Bad Lyrics By Good Artists (0:23:11)

Steve thinks corny songs are preferable to pretentious twoddle, Ricky and Steve break down the plot of Enrique Iglesias' Hero video. Followed by adverts!!!!

7. It's That Point In The Show (0:25:19)

Ricky wants to play classics, Song For The Lovers is written by Jimmy Webb with his lovely arse. What?

8. They Just Wheel You Out (0:26:48)

Steve hopes nu-metal fans can appreciate these classic songs, Karl tries to plug Ian Camfield's show - to the displeasure of Rick and Steve, Karl gets upset, Steve orders him to switch his microphone off and stop interrupting Ricky telling us about Camfield, he does, they forgive Karl, more ads!!!!

9. English Quite Good (0:28:40)

Karl had trouble filling out a job application, misunderstanding the 'language' section, but he's making an effort, by nearly remembering the name of Slobodan Milosevic. We learn that Karl never got his GCSE exam results, he thinks he took English, Maths, Art and Physics, but can't remember it well and he doesn't believe in revision. What's bugging Karl, is how do you put down a snake? You can pick it up because it's deaf, but putting it down? Who knows. Back to academia and next week, on this very show, live on-air, we will find out Karl's exam results... oh yeah, he didn't collect them because he had to use gold ink in his printing job that day.

10. Bruce Lee Is Not Dead (0:36:44)

Bruce Lee faked his death to work as an undercover cop and Karl makes some good old-fashioned racist comments.

11. Ricky Won't Diss Steve or His Black Queen (0:40:48)

Dilated Peoples do a trail for Steve.

12. There Has To Be Shit Involved(0:42:30)

Steve remembers Snoop Dogg lyrics, did Elvis fake his death?

13. I Don't Think You'll be Going Back to the Fish Factory (0:47:47)

Ricky admits he knows what Karl was thinking with his Mowgli comment, Karl would relax Ricky, the low aspirations of Family Fortunes contestants, Ian Moore "Naturally", Ricky insults the Duchess of York and Steve claims he wrote Lady In Red, Song for the Lovers is early pre-gravely Tom Waits.

Quotes

Steve: “And did your Dad, like, while he was listening to you, did he like tap the nurse and go ‘can you get that twat off the air’?”

Karl: “It’s weird that they’ve only found ‘im, 'cause he’s the Tallest Man…”

Ricky: “…he’s written such brilliant classics with his lovely arse as – oh, why did I say that…”

Karl: “I woke up the other night, quite late, and I said to me girlfriend, I said, ‘How do you put a snake down?’”

Steve: “I wouldn’t expect ya to diss me. Or me black queen.”

FBI: Elvis, it’s a good idea. I’m just wondering if there’s maybe something a little bit more…glamorous…for your death. I mean, you could take a bullet for the president.
Elvis: Huh. Wot? And shit all over him?
FBI: No no no. There’d be no crap at all. No, you just…you could just take a bullet and…
Elvis: There has to be shit involved.

Playlist

Starsailor - Poor Misguided Fool
Nirvana - Man Who Sold The World
Princess Superstar - Bad Babysitter
Ash - ?
The Streets - Let's Push Things Forward
Lostprophets - Fake Sound of Progress
Gomez - Shot Shot
Song For The Lovers: Jimmy Webb - If These Walls Could Speak
The Cure - ?
PJ Harvey - ?
Hundred Reasons - If I Could
Hip-Hop Hooray: Dilated Peoples - Worst Comes To Worst
The Smiths - There Is A Light That Never Goes Out
Song For The Ladies: Tom Waits - Ol' 55

Download

Download Page

External Links

YouTube: Enrique Inglesias - Hero

Series 0   |   Series 1   |   Series 2   |   Series 3   |   Series 4
Presenters Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington
Others Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost
Features Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers
Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase
Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More...